My Boyfriend Is Both Attractive and Safe. Why Do I Think of Breaking Up with Him?

Me and my boyfriend have been collectively for round three months. When we first began relationship I didn’t actually get the butterflies, I bought nervous trigger I used to be scared that I might say one thing and he wouldn’t like me. He requested me to be his girlfriend and I stated sure though I didn’t actually like like him but or possibly I did however I do know I do now. At the beginning I might nitpick each little factor about him and I don’t know why. He’s such an incredible man and once we’re collectively I simply really feel so secure and like nothing else issues. I’m sexually drawn to him however when it comes right down to having intercourse I all the time get nervous and insecure and overthink every little thing. Now after I’m not with him and infrequently once we’re collectively I get random ideas of oh do I actually like him and attempting to persuade myself I don’t. When we’re aside I simply really feel so distant from him and my thoughts tries to inform me I don’t like him and I ought to break up with him after I actually don’t wish to, I don’t perceive what’s happening.


You’re in a wholesome relationship, Grace.

This is the way it feels.

I do know it may be complicated when your default setting for relationships is nervousness however belief me on this one.

I do know it may be complicated when your default setting for relationships is nervousness however belief me on this one.

I spent ten years relationship everybody in Los Angeles.

I by no means had a girlfriend for greater than eight months.

I used to be all the time searching for a better excessive.

The ladies who excited me most dumped me – in a single month, three months, six months.

The ladies who had been secure and easygoing by no means appeared like sufficient of a problem.

It took me awhile however I lastly outgrew the will for butterflies – in all probability after I realized that butterflies had by no means been a superb predictor of my future.

I’ve an train in Love U known as The Husband Picker.

In it, you be taught why you nitpick some guys and never others, and take into account what it’s prefer to have a person who is continually nitpicking with you.

What you finally notice is that the explanation you’re feeling secure along with your boyfriend is that he accepts you as you’re. This doesn’t essentially produce a dopamine spike, which is why you end up second-guessing your relationship, however you don’t must be hooked on your boyfriend like he’s crystal meth. You have to have a boyfriend who permits you to let down your guard, be your self, and sure, nonetheless present sexual attraction.

You have all of that.

Now sit again, calm down, and attempt to benefit from the present.

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